By Doug Lange

The Law of Relativity teaches that nothing in life is inherently good or bad—things simply are. We’re the ones who assign meaning to our experiences. What we label as “bad” often only feels that way because we’re comparing it to something we believe is “better.”

Andy Andrews, author of The Noticer, put it perfectly:
“Happiness is not about circumstances, it is about perspective. And, perspective is a matter of how we choose to see things, and how we see things is a matter of choice.”
The Law of Relativity is all about that—perspective. It’s about what we choose to focus on, and how we choose to interpret it.

Two people can go through the exact same situation, yet come out with completely different attitudes. One might feel bitter and defeated, while the other emerges hopeful and grounded. Why? Because they chose to view the situation through different lenses.
Marriage is a great example of this. One spouse might look at the marriage and see only difficulty and strain—plenty of evidence exists to support that view. But the other spouse might look at the very same challenges and feel grateful. That spouse might see strength: “We’re still here. Other couples are splitting up, and we’ve weathered the storms together.” Same situation. Same evidence. Different perspective.

I’ve learned that I have the ability to see things from multiple angles. But if I’m honest, it’s often easier for me to focus on the negative. And when I do, it’s like negativity multiplies—more things seem to go wrong. But when I consciously choose to see the good in things, I’m noticeably happier. My thinking shifts. I laugh more. I feel lighter, more hopeful.
In that state of mind, I can handle problems better than I used to. I stop seeing challenges as life picking on me—and instead, I start to see them as invitations. Invitations to grow. To stretch. To become who I’m meant to be.
My problems don’t disappear—sometimes they even get bigger—but I can face them with more strength because I’ve chosen a better lens. A more empowering one.

The Law of Relativity also opens the door to gratitude. Instead of, “Why me?” the question becomes, “Who might I become because of this?”
It might sound strange, but other people’s trials often make me pause with gratitude. Not because I want them to suffer, but because seeing someone else’s challenges helps me recognize that my own problems—though real—are often lighter than they could be. And if I had to trade trials with someone else? I’d probably still choose mine. That shift in perspective helps me reframe my hardships in a more positive light.

I genuinely believe we can find gratitude in our current circumstances—no matter how difficult they are. And when we do, we prepare ourselves to receive even greater blessings. After all, how can we be trusted with more, if we’re not grateful for what we already have?